DISAGREEMENTS WITH YOUR FAMILY LAWYER:
a Discussion
SO, YOU’RE IN A DIVORCE AND SUDDENLY YOU’RE FIGHTING YOUR ATTORNEY,TOO!
Everybody has the right to disagree with everybody else, of course. But this is not always the best path to take. Speaking from an anecdotal acquaintance with family law—I am not a lawyer, I am the office manager in a small family law firm in MN. — I think most instances of disagreeing with your lawyer are more often than not a most disadvantageous strategy for a an attorney’s client to pursue. Likewise, a lawyer disagreeing with his or her client is not always to the advantage of either. When these situations arise it is best for all parties involved to stop, think, discuss rationally, and take action – anything from agreeing to disagree on some things, to a parting of the ways, hopefully but not always amicably. Yes, you can fire your attorney and your attorney can fire you –within legal and ethical boundaries established for the profession. But yes, you can fire your lawyer.
DIFFERENCES BETWEEN CLIENT AND LAWYER CAN BE FINE, BUT…
Don’t get me wrong – disagreements over legal matters as important as divorce, child support, alimony, child custody, handicapped children caught up in a divorce — all of these are big questions financially, emotionally, socially – to the lawyer, to their client, to any children involved, to the families and friends involved. And disagreements with your attorney and other parties to the divorce, are sure to arise especially forcefully in highly contested divorces – those which lead to a trial and those in which everyone involved comes out with a bitter taste in their mouth –over the outcome, over the emotional toll, over the expense, over the time spent – or time wasted – in legal processes.
Sometimes disagreements between clients and attorneys work out for the best. There are cases in which the client fires the lawyer and works out — through mediation, counseling, and hard work – a reasonable settlement.
There are also other cases – for instance, a client who files for divorce but attempts to work out a deal or a settlement with the other party behind the back of the attorney. This is not a good idea.
SO WORK OUT A STRATEGY FOR HANDLING DISAGREEMENTS BETWEEN YOURSELF AND YOUR ATTORNEY
What is a good idea is to work out a strategy with your lawyer that aims at accomplishing what you now want – reconciliation, a certain alimony arrangement, new custody and child support stipulations, and soon. Your goals might change during the course of the divorce proceedings. That’s fine. It may mean taking a new tack with your existing attorney, firing your attorney and hiring another lawyer, or working these issues out in mediation, counseling, and other forms of Alternative Dispute Resolution(ADR).
I’m not pushing for any particular course of action here. “I’m just sayin…’” as the saying goes. Think about what you are doing, look before you leap (or commit to a course of action),and be as open as you can with your lawyer – and with the other side – though that last is definitely another story!
Thomas Moore
Office Manager
www.MooreFamilyLawMN.com
