Divorce can bring out the worst in people, and when you’ve been married to your ex for a while you know how to push each other’s buttons. Luckily, even if you aren’t on your best behavior during your divorce, you and your ex can be friends afterwards. Here are 4 tips to get you and your ex back on track.
- Work on forgiving each other.
The first step to becoming friends is to begin forgiving each other. From here on out, don’t discuss who did what during the divorce, and instead talk about how the two of you can move forward and begin the healing process. It may not be easy or happen right away, but if you both decide you want a friendship, forgiving each other is crucial.
- Accept your role in the divorce.
Along with forgiving each other, you must accept your role in the divorce. If you both acknowledge your mistakes, it removes the victim label from both of you. Doing this puts you on an even playing field and can be a jumping point for your friendship.
- Get inspiration from other divorced couples.
Looking to other divorced couples for inspiration on how the two of you would like to act or not act towards each other, is a great idea. Look at your friend’s relationship with their exes, and decide which aspects you and your ex would like to emulate. Talk about what you both would like in your new friendship and things you both would like to avoid. Learning from your friend’s mistakes and accomplishes can help make your friendship the best it can be.
- Decide to do what’s best for your children.
At the end of the day, the focus should always be on your children. Focusing your energy on raising your children can help bring the two of you together. When you’re both interested in doing what’s best for your children, you are on the same team. You’re both trying to accomplish the same goals. Even if you have lingering hostility towards each other, working towards the same goal is a great starting point for a friendship that could develop later.
What do you think? Are you and your ex friends? Did you overcome any hurdles while working on your friendship with your ex? Share your experience with us in the comment section below.